No one is perfect, though some have it together better than
others. There are those which have life figured out, or at least seem to, and
there are the rest of us, the people like me. But, rather than how the world or
its inhabitants could improve or better conform to my needs, I want to talk
about how I can work on myself. I look at myself in a harsher light than most
of the people around me. I know this isn’t healthy, but it is who I am. I am
critical of myself and dislike many things. There are many character traits I
could improve on.
Patience is one of the bigger ones that comes to mind. I do
have a temper, and sometimes I am overly impatient with certain situations or
people. I would like to be a more patient person. Also, I would like to find a
way to let go of some of the anxiety, stress, and worries I seem to always
carry. I hope to be able to accept that there are certain things I cannot
change, so shouldn’t worry myself sick about them. Going through life in a
state of stress simply hurts my health and decreases the happiness of myself
and those around me. I also hope to one day lessen the weight upon my
shoulders, and be in a genuine good, happy place in life. I could also work on
not overreacting about certain things, and turning otherwise negative turn of
events into an adventure. I also hope to learn to not let those around me
dictate my mood so much. Of course, when my loved ones hurt, I hurt, just as I
share in their triumphs and laughter. However, I am very guilty of letting a
coworker, teacher, fellow student, even my parents bring me down when they are
having a bad day. Just because my manager at work is cranky and irritable
because she had been fighting with her fiancé does not mean I need to spend the
rest of my shift, or even my day, miserable or cranky myself because of it.
Finally, I want to work on letting things that happened in the past go. I have
a philosophy of “forgive but don’t forget”, and in a way that works. However,
holding on to things I have done, or someone else has done in their past is
unhealthy and leads to unnecessary pent-up anger. I hope that I can improve in
these aspects, and more.
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